April 29, 2020

I've been a hold a LOT lately. I mean, a good 10% of my life might be spent on hold. I've learned a lot about hold. First of all, there is a time continuum that exists. "Can I put you on a brief hold?" Doesn't sound ominous- but, it can be. What you thought was a short duration of time becomes a long period of time, disrupted by someone coming back to give you false hope of an end to your not short duration. Turns out they are just confirming you are still there. They use terms like "sorry for the continued wait, do you mind if I put you on hold for another minute?" They know you have no choice. They know that you need to have help or you wouldn't be on hold. And that's how they keep you there. No one gets up in the morning, and while deciding what to do today chooses HOLD. The next thing you know, in your world you've been on hold for over an hour, and in their world..wherever that world is, you've been on hold for 3-5 minutes. They respond in their chipper voice, probably because instead of trying to solve your issues, they've been chatting with their coworkers and enjoying snacks in the break room while they scroll through memes on BoredPanda.

The other main thing I've learned about hold is that the quality of hold music varies greatly between business. I believe there is a requirement if you are an insurance company to have really awful music, and to have there only be two full minutes of it before it repeats. The companies with Sirius radio on hold have my attention. Also companies that have quirky messages inserted within decent hold music are also a favorite ("Did you know while you've been on hold, a Canadian goose had completed it's entire migaratoy flight from Ontario to Ft Lauderdale? Thank you for supporting wild geese").

The worst kind of hold is the death hold. You know the one. Motor vehicle departments have a patent on them, but other companies use them too, and usually don't get caught for copywright violations. I think its because MVD's like knowing they started a trend. The dead hold is when you've been on hold for a minimum of 1 hour (3-5 minutes in phone years) and then AS THEY ANSWER THE PHONE, they hang up on you.

Why am I telling you this? Because what else am I going to do while I spend 35 hours a day on hold?

I did get a ton of online shopping done and we are going to have a lot of very heavy packages arriving soon. I apologize to FedEx, UPS, USPS, and maybe even Amazon. Sinks and toilets are not lightweight. Today we also ventured out to a granite yard to pick out some scrap granite for Shannon's bathroom vanity. I now know way more about granite than I did 12 hours ago.

The other fun thing we did today was pause our crazy life for this:

 

And while we did that, Shannon was having quite the day herself! 

Her personally written report:

"Kids! Today we are living life! So I got my trach capped which means I breathe 100% on my own {through my nose and/or mouth- not in through the trach and out through my nose}like a normal person! I’ve had it on all day and was told tomorrow night if I wanted to push respiratory and ask, I could wear the speaking cap tomorrow night all night! Which just means I’m progressing way faster than any doctor, nurse, and therapist had expected. I’m going to get this trach out possibly be the end of next week.

Today was packed. In occupational therapy I practiced putting pants on. I did it successfully 98% by myself and I was wearing sweatpants and then pulling comfy pj pants over them. So not only was it much harder than it had to be but I did it pretty much on my own! Didn’t have to hold on to anything and I did some major balancing which was great! I had to take a few breathers but all day my blood pressure has been outstanding!

Physical therapy I took a sip of monster and said “Bring it! I’m ready” then got in the manual chair. We checked my blood pressure and only had a little bit of pressure issues but it never dropped below 95. And then. Guys. Then. I was free!!!! They slopped that mask on my face and I rode out of the room!! It shocked everyone who knows me that I was wandering around the halls and I raced to the elevator. We arrived at the 6th floor and I used some major muscles to get out of the elevator and made my way to (pause for effect) outside!!!! It was official freedom!! I was breathing real air! We wheeled around and looked at the world. My art therapist saw me and raced outside. She said she was having a bad day but seeing me made her day. Some tears were almost shed on her part.

I made my way back downstairs and did some thinking puzzles in speech. She said they were really difficult but I found them a little easy. I worked on my painting some more in art and we had a lot of laughs.

I sat in my chair for the full 5 hours after that. I’m supposed to sit for 5 hours everyday but I haven’t been able to stand it. But today I was just chillin' and definitely sat for more than 5 hours, which is great! I also have been eating more and my arm pain is gone!

Please keep up the prayers people! I am forever grateful for everything you do in your life for me. It has truly touched me to see so many people stop their lives even for a second just to help me in some way, including people I don't even know! It gives me hope and strength."

So Shannon had a pretty great day all around. I can imagine what it looked like at the hospital when they were letting Shannon out of her room. They told me that in order to make her trip to the roof  happen- given her open airway, they would have to have minimal people in the hallways and no one else on the roof. It was probably like that crazy scene from Toy Story when Andy got his new toy :) 

Thank you for being such a huge part of Shannon's recovery. Your prayers and support are exactly what Shannon and our family needs. Please pray for Shannon's continued respiratory improvement, for her shoulder to continue to mend, for her spinal cord to make the necessary connections so she can function as needed, for her endurance for therapies to increase, and for her nervous system to be able to stabilize her blood pressure. Thank you for everything!

And, Shannon's Disney Day: 

Sargent- Red alert! Red alert! Andy is coming up stairs...now!! Resume your positions! Resume your positions NOW!
{panic ensues as toys rush everywhere}

Woody- Andy's coming everybody! Back to your places!!!

Mr. Potato Head: Where's my ear?! Anybody seen my ear? Whose's seen my ear?