May 10, 2020

Three and a half years ago, Shannon and I were having a pretty wild summer. We were driving back and forth between our home in MD and our home in PA every week. The MD home was getting fixed up to sell- it had been a rental the first few years that we lived in PA. The days we were back in PA, we tried to work at the Philadelphia Temple open house as much as possible. When we weren't working on the house, or at the temple, we were trying to smash the rest of life in. It was a really long, hot, hard, glorious summer. I learned a lot about sacrifice that summer, in so many ways. I learned about the power of service, and the blessings we receive from it. And I learned that Shannon is a rockstar when it comes to sticking to a task until it's done. I have no doubt that whatever she puts her mind to, she will finish. The trick is to have her put her mind to it- like most of us struggle with!

Today Shannon slept in until the afternoon again- a new Sunday ritual. She's very good at finishing the task of sleeping. She also had art therapy, and I think that was about it. I had a great time FaceTiming her today and hearing all about the crazy dreams she's had, and the ones she remembers from when she was sedated. Her memory is still a struggle- and it's something she is working on. But I found out today that she DOES remember the chicken in the SICU. There really wasn't a chicken in there, but Shannon told us and her nurses about it on multiple occasions. Turns out it was a mechanical chicken, and at some point had pieces of it lying around. We were told at the time that Shannon had SICU psychosis; and I love that she remembers the chicken. She was pretty passionate about having seen that chicken for several days.

Shannon also shared her escape plan from the hospital with me today- not that she's chained in there or anything, but it's a plan. You'll have to read it in the Disney quote at the bottom.

It was really nice to have a relaxing day today. Of course I love Mother's Day, but this year I wasn't sure how I would handle it. I'm really struggling with the various pulls on my heart. It's hard to celebrate a marriage with one of my kids, while going through the grief of this kind of accident with another, and then the trials of being confined during a pandemic with twins and a toddler with another...and then be a mama who is still actively raising two others who are dealing with their own struggles through all of this. Is one heart big enough and strong enough for all of that? The short answer it no. It's not. I can't be everything to everyone at the same time. And I watch one of my kid's countenance fall as I focus on the needs of another. I've mentioned before that I wish I could duplicate myself, if only for the time being. So I pray that they will all understand that I'm doing my best, and they will forgive me for not being everything they need me to be right now. It would be so nice to go back to the days when my biggest struggles involved getting six kids out the door at the same time all fully clothed (not necessarily weather appropriately) and having all been fed or have food to eat on the way. Those were the easy days- too bad I didn't realize it then. :D

Mother's Day was actually nicer than expected. It started with a few texts from friends wishing me a happy day. My youngest two and Lancer made me breakfast. I spoke or texted with all but one of my kids (there is still one hour left in the day), AND there were several things that made it so fantastic!

This kid: (This is our Mother's Day photo together- you do what you can)

And then these beautiful people showed up at my house! I haven't hugged them in two months!! 

Plus- Lancer and his sous chef's Krisha and Steve made me my traditional Mother's Day Beef Wellington- which I figured out today I've requested for 23 years. So you know this is good stuff if I keep asking for it over and over again. 

He and Krisha also made some super cute and well plated chocolate mousse in a chocolate blossom cup. 

 And even though I personally picked out a couple of these flower bouquets, a few wonderful friends added to my counter top flower display, and I have them to gaze at for a week! (Just ignore those freeze dried apples and gummy bears there on the counter- nothing to see here)

I am so very blessed to have the wonderful kids that I do, and the amazing husband/father that helps  through everything. We are definitely fighting along side Shannon as a family, and she's has such a powerful army of prayer warriors behind her in this fight. We would love for you to pray for Shannon's lung congestion to subside so she can get relief from it an breathe better, for her cough to be productive, for her to be strong and recognize her progress, and for her to be strengthened in all the places she needs to so she will be prepared to come home with more independence. Thank you to all of you who sent messages of support to Shannon and our family today and last week. We love you all more than you will ever know, and are grateful for all that you are doing for her and for us. 

Did you know Shannon is OBSESSED with books? I may have put her on restriction from buying or borrowing more books at one point in her teen years...Today's meme is perfect for her:

(I just realized that these two go together- Anyone get the connection between Dory and the quote below?)

Shannon's escape plan...er, Disney Quote:

Mike: I think I have a plan here: using mainly spoons, we dig a tunnel under the city and release it into the wild.

Sulley: Spoons?

Mike: That’s it, I’m out of ideas. We’re closed. Hot air balloon? Too expensive. Giant slingshot? Too conspicuous. Enormous wooden horse? Too Greek.

Monster's Inc.